Dashing off

It got cold again last night.

I'm debating wearing boots.

I need to buy a comforter.

My red laundry is still hanging on the laundry porch, a good book is much more entertaining than putting clothes away.

Mexican Tomato Chicken Flavor lays continue to taste like tomato soup, but are nice when paired with Convenient Noodles.

Birthday cake oreos are the only ones worth buying.

I'm going to be late to work.

Lunch Hour

I spent my lunch hour today getting internet in my new apartment.
Success.
I've spent the remaining 20 minutes trying to jimmy the lock on my apartment door so that I can get out.
I am locked in my apartment...

What better time than to update the blog, right?

Here's what I started last week, and neglected.

Yet another Sunday has come and gone, and we’ve been in Beijing for long enough that it doesn’t feel like vacation anymore.

Super Husband’s classes started a week ago, and while he still doesn’t have textbooks, he’s pretty happy with his selection.

I completed my second week as a full-fledged ESL teacher. My classes are growing as more kids come back from end of summer vacations, and the ones that have been there since day one are getting accustomed to me, and the routine. Monday was Teacher’s Day here in China, and I received a lovely potted plant from one of my students, and a rose from one of the other teacher’s kids. And, on Friday one of my two-year-olds ran down the hallway to hug my knees. It was touching. So, not only did I clean up on Teacher’s Day, but I also have all the baby love. Now, if those babies could just start singing the ABC’s with me, instead of staring like I’ve grown a second head. But we’re making progress. They now know their English names, which is a plus because their Chinese names are a bit difficult for me. But most English speaking Chinese people have an English name. Sometimes they pick for themselves, which can end in disaster. They’ll be called things like Coco, or Cherry. There is, I kid you not, a Clancy. Clancy is a very cute four-year-old girl.

But that’s enough about work.

On to the interesting bits –

We have, today, Sunday September 16^th, taken possession of the keys to my new flat. And what a luxurious feeling that is. We immediately hot footed it over to WuMart (not joking, that’s what it’s called) and bought the necessities. Toilet paper, a waist basket, hand soap, an electric kettle, and a mop were all toted back to the apartment. I might want to look in to getting one of these rolling shopping bag/baskets I see people with. It’d certainly make that trip easier. Wu Mart is about a 20-minute walk from my apartment, and they have everything I might ever need, but not exactly the best quality. There is an Ikea here, and I might head there to do some price checking. As far as I can tell, though, it makes about 1000x more sense to head over to one of the markets and bargain for a silk comforter, instead of paying $40 for a not very nice one at WuMart.

Since then I've been to the Hepingciqiao market twice, and procured stickers for my class, and a sheet set for my bed. I've also discovered that I still love bargaining, even if I have been reduced to communicating via calculator. Dismay at the initial price can be conveyed without verbal cues. As Ursula would say "Don't underestimate the power of Body Language". Although, she's a bit bawdy there... 

Now, to the aforementioned consumption of penis.

We have decided that Saturday nights shall be, to the best of our ability, Chuaner (pronounced Chwar) night. Chuaner roughly translates to "skewered", and can also be the word for ear piercing. But here in Beijing, and across much of China, it means deliciousness roasted over coals. They have greens wrapped in tofu sheets and brushed with a spicy sauce, mushrooms prepared similarly, and chicken (breast and hearts), and lamb. Along with some delicacies, such as calamari, and goat penis. Super Husband generally takes care of the ordering, especially when there are no pictures involved. This was the case on Saturday. After making his selection he proceeded to use his translation app, pleco, to see what he'd just decided on. It was with a great deal of surprise that he said "Penis. I ordered penis." And sure enough, what we had originally thought was the calamari on our little tray was indeed the phallic region of a goat. Or five goats. We're not really sure. 

Now, don't be alarmed, or put off from the whole chuaner experience. 

Just don't order the 4rmb options. Stick to the 1rmb fare, and you're in the clear. 

Time now to take advantage of my enforced enclosure here and take a nap while I wait for Super Husband to come and hopefully unlock the door from the outside.

We'll see.

Wish me luck. 

Please Excuse...

The lack of activity.

We've just completed the move to the 6th floor, apartment 602, but we have yet to acquire internet connectivity. This means that the time I have to check e-mail, Facebook, and blog is reduced to the 15 minutes at work, before class, in the morning, and the 20 minutes after class, before I go in the evening. It's cramping my style. 

Hopefully my apartment will be all sorts of wired before the end of the week. 

Also, and more on this later, Super Husband unknowingly ordered goat penis on a skewer on Saturday night. He realized his mistake after it was presented to us, but he consumed it anyway. I declined. 

Flats, foods, and a tower of beer.

We’ve been here a week now, and while it still doesn’t feel like home it isn’t as strange a place as it was.

The food continues to be a highlight, even if I don’t always know what’s going to come out of the kitchen. I can say chicken (it sounds like G-row), and not a whole lot else. It’s possible that pork sounds like Jew-Row, which is a little ironic, but I might just be misinterpreting the wait staff’s explanations. We’ve had noodles (mein, which is pronounced me-in) and dumplings recently. An absolutely enormous quantity of food comes out of the kitchen every time you order. We’ll be sharing a lot of plates, I think.

 

By the way, it only cost 30rmb for both plates, which is a bit less than $5 total.

We also ventured to Laker’s last night (Friday) to meet up with a few of Scott and Joe’s friends. We’re meeting quite a few Brits here. Laker’s has what at first glance is a very nice menu, but after Zach (from New Jersey) ordered the nachos to share with his girlfriend, we quickly figured out that they talk the talk but can’t walk the walk. Or cook the food.

Super Husband ordered a veggie burger, which came out with more mayo than patty, but was palatable once you scrapped the glop off. I had the “Pastoral Scenery Pizza”, minus the peppers. It came out with cherry tomatoes, broccoli, and the regular pizza fixins. If we’re in the mood for a not terribly expensive, decent pizza we know where to go. 

They also have beer towers for 50rmb ($8.50ish), and Friday nights in September they’re doing a “buy two get one free” drink special, so three Tsingtao beer towers were shared by the table.

I did not partake, opting instead for the “Bucket special”, which is quite as you imagine, a bucket of drink. I chose a screwdriver. Whatever vodka they use is pretty cheap, and weak, which suits me just fine; I only ordered it because it was cheaper than getting a regular orange juice.

On Thursday night Super Husband and I went to look at an apartment three stops north of the school where I teach. We wont be renting it. It was an efficiency in the extreme. One bathroom, and a “bedroom” – living room – kitchen combination that puts your stove about six feet from your bed. I’ve seen four apartments in this style, and it boggles my mind. The rent is over $600 for all of these, and the Feng Shui is just horrible. The highlight of these apartments is really the bathroom. There is no tub, and no shower in the normal sense. In a couple of them you literally sit on the toilet to shower. I’m not kidding. The showerhead is attached to the wall and you sit on your toilet with the water running over you.

Yesterday, Friday, during lunch I saw another flat one stop south of my school, about a 30-minute walk. It’s in my price range, and only has three drawbacks.

1) It’s a sixth floor walk up. I’m trying to think positively about this, and say things like “No need for a stair-master if I’m walking up six flights of stairs a few times every day”.

2) The bathroom, while better than sitting on your toilet to shower, is still small and weird.

3) It is a furnished apartment, and the stuff is fine, but they haven’t furnished pots, pans, or dishes. This isn’t a huge problem, but it adds to the cost of the place.

Once you’ve made it, huffing and puffing, up the stairs you unlock the door and enter a tinsy, tiny foyer, the bathroom is on the left. Then there’s the living room, complete with a fold out couch, heater, tv, and glory of all glories, a bookshelf! Two doors lead off the living room, to the right is the bedroom with a decent armoire, a tv, and a desk. The left-hand door leads to the small, but workable kitchen. Both the bedroom and kitchen have doors that lead to the laundry porch. The washing machine is on the laundry porch, and the ceiling has long metal rods for hanging your clothes to dry. I’m thinking about getting a few potted plants to set out there, as well, but with the bitter winter coming, who knows. 

One thing that I find a bit weird here, though, is that realtors charge a fee to the renters, not the landlords. And it’s not cheap, either. I have a feeling that my bargaining skills are going to come in quite handy this week. But I’ve just been informed, at 4:15pm on Saturday that if I don’t put down a 3000rmb deposit before 5:30 this evening the apartment is going to go to someone else.

Super Husband has just left with Joe to play football. And by football I mean soccer, but all of our new British friends alternately get a bit annoyed, or just find it silly and amusing that we call it that, so I’m changing my vocabulary.

They all, of course, think it’s quite amusing that I say y’all.

I have a feeling that when I get back “chips” will be “crisps” and “fries” will be “chips”, “candy” may even be “sweets”.

Speaking of crisps, I need to remember to take a picture of the dizzying array of Lay’s flavors. Last night, post Laker’s, we purchased a bag of Mexican Tomato Chicken Flavor. They just taste like tomato soup, but that’s fine by me. I want to try the Cool Cucumber flavor, but haven’t gotten up the nerve.

At the small market around the corner from the apartment we’re in now we bought a few pears and peaches. They’re not Georgia peaches, that’s for sure, but they’re sweet and juicy, and they don’t have any buggies in them. Romaine lettuce is going to be rather hard to come by, apparently, but I’ll just have to learn to eat new greens for salads.

It actually seems cheaper here to eat out for dinner. One ingredient at the market costs the same as a whole plate at a restaurant.

The internet is down. No one is really sure if it’s because this is China, or because it needs to be paid. Hopefully someone figures it out soon, because I have things to do.

Because the internet is down this post has been sitting in Word for five hours, as I slowly add relevant bits to it. Between writing most of the post and now, I’ve walked the ten minutes to the bank, withdrawn monies, and paid a deposit for the apartment. It shall be mine tomorrow when I pay the realtors’ fee, and two months rent. In China you’re supposed to pay three, or even six months rent at a time. It’s a nice system for the landlords, I’m sure, but it really isn’t awesome for me.

This is the view from the flat on a decently clear day.

And, the view on a normal day.

Beijing, what will you do to our lungs?

We arrived in Beijing and

Beijing didn't welcome us.
It wrapped its sticky palms around our throats and wrestled us into submission.
We yelled "Uncle" pretty quickly.
I expected it to be hard, different, challenging.
What I didn't expect was to be sleeping in an un-air conditioned closet.
Or to have no phones for a week.

It really was a miserable first day.
We arrived on the scene at about 11am Thursday the 30th of August, only to find out that our would-be guide didn't know the address of the apartment they had arranged for me. A number of phone calls later, and an hour sitting, and sweating, on a corner with our many, many bags, and we were met by two English ...men... Boys? Chaps? Who hailed two taxis and directed the drives to our new abode.
It's in the Jocund Garden Community, just north of the Fourth Ring Road. But Google maps doesn't recognize it as a place.
The building itself is fine, but the apartment is... Below even my standards of cleanliness. (For those who don't know, I'm considered quite the messy, untidy, antithesis of a neat freak.)
And the room that would/should be mine continues to be occupied by the teacher I'm replacing. One of the aforementioned English chaps. It is no fault of his, of course, as in true Chinese style those in charge neglected to mention my arrival to him until Wednesday evening. I can't expect him to move all his things out in one evening.
So, I've re-negotiated my contract (I'm quite glad my mommy is a lawyer, or that might have been a daunting prospect) to include a ¥2000 housing bonus. That's roughly $300. From the bits of research I've done, a decent apartment in an area close to my work, and the subway, could be anywhere from $300-$1500. Obviously we'll go with the more reasonable options.

And on to the phone business. Here I would like to take a moment to curse Verizon for their unkind habit of making the iPhone un-unlockable. Uncool, Verizon, uncool. So, after enlisting the help of a Bolivian masters student who has lived here for three years, and three trips to different tech shops, we have found out that we have to buy new phones. Great. We're currently researching which phones will best serve our needs.  The Samsung Galaxy has been mentioned, as has another Samsung. My priority is that it have maps, Whatsapp, and email. I'd love to be able to continue playing Words with Friends, but I don't want to pay ¥4000 to do it.

This morning, Monday, September 3rd, I started my new job teaching English at the Meg Bilingual International Academy. I currently teach the Cocoon class, which has four two-year-olds, and the Bumblebee class, whom I have yet to meet. We are fed lunch at the school, but given two and a half hours of lunch break in the mid day, so I am enjoying the free Wifi and over-priced coffee at UBC coffee.

It might be the first truly relaxing moment I've had in the five days we've been here. There is a monk in the booth next to me, clacking away on his iPhone screen. I guess he didn't turn the keyboard sound off. They're playing Mozart in the background, but it's often interrupted by burping patrons and the bell that signals new arrivals. I can tune all that out in favor of A Little Night Music.

Don't get me wrong, it's not all bad. The food, surprisingly enough, has been really tasty, so far. We haven't even encountered any weird feet, fish heads, or claws. We didn't eat anything the whole first day we were here. The heat, and strangeness, and turmoil of it all must have completely sapped our appetites. On the second evening (Friday) we ventured into one of the small restaurants around the corner from the apartment. We ordered the sixth thing from the top, sat, and hoped it wouldn't be strange and disgusting when it arrived. To our relief we had ordered beef and potatoes over rice. (Yes, we've had to forgo our vegetarianism for the time being. It is nigh impossible here.) Last night we ordered take-out from the same place and were rewarded with what upon first glance appeared to be zucchini and chicken over rice, but was actually cucumber. Tasty, nonetheless. I wish I could ask for the recipes. And, to make a good thing better, one plate is only ¥12, or $2. The servings are such that, if you're not starving, two people can easily share one plate and feel satisfied.

I'm also enjoying the subway. It's air conditioned in the summer, and heated in the winter, and it costs ¥2 no matter how far you go. The only problem is that it's a bit of a hike from the apartment to the nearest stop (Datunlu East, if you were wondering), and even more of a hike from Super Husband's dorm to his nearest stop (Mudanyuan). I'm thinking about investing in a couple of bikes, one for each stop. Especially if we can get the ones that are built to accommodate two people at a time. Or maybe we'll get a rickshaw, and I'll just make Super Husband cart me around. 

My lunch hour is over, and I have to leave the confines of UBC for the chaos of the Fourth Ring Road.